Our Cockroach Graveyard

Monday, January 8, 2018

Hey Mom,

I´m sad to hear that you’re sick! I hope you get feeling better soon! I’m really sad I wasn´t there for the wedding. It’s only been 4 months and I´m just overwhelmed thinking about all the changes that have already happened and all the things I have missed. I try not to think about how slow the time passes and how much I´ve got ahead of me, but it’s hard. I´ve always got thoughts of home in my head and it is really, really tough.  Again this week, especially knowing about Tanners wedding, I just had a lot of longing for home.

I know you don’t like hearing about how the language is making other things out here difficult – and that you would tell me that I should focus on enjoying things and helping people in ways that don’t require speaking Portuguese - but it’s just impossible. The LIFE of a human is to communicate, we´re social. With Elder Kozlowski I´m at least able to have a couple fun experiences because we can understand each other and sometimes speak English. But the life of a missionary is so much talking and talking and talking. Understanding people’s questions, answering them, helping people overcome the problems they have, getting to know their personality and point of view, and just talking, listening and teaching. I just can’t.

This week during a lesson Elder Kozlowski had to step out for a few minutes to take a phone call and my job was to just talk about the apostasy with our investigator. Mom, it was a disaster. He had a ton of questions and I seriously could not understand what the heck he was asking. He would talk really slow like I was a baby and still I didn’t know what he was asking. And when Elder Kozlowski came back he had to reteach about the apostasy because the man didn’t understand what I had been trying to say. It was so humiliating. I can’t even teach one simple topic alone. How am I supposed to become an independent missionary, someday a senior companion, a trainer, a leader? I am really struggling to see a future where I am successful. Everyone just says with time it´ll happen but every week passes and I´m still just clueless. I´m getting tired and my mission has barely started. (When we spoke with Carson on Christmas I had a chance to talk with his trainer and ask him how Carson was doing with the language.  He assured us that Carson is actually doing really well and learning quite quickly.  He is right where he should be for a missionary who has only been introduced and immersed in Portuguese for four months.  Everything has always come very easily to Carson – I just remind him this is what the rest of us humans feel like most of the time.) 

Stuff that happened this week:

Circa finally had her interview to be baptized. 

She is ALWAYS working on Sundays (and just about every other day) just trying to feed her kids as a single mom. But she said that she would leave work on Sunday to be baptized. We were super excited. We have been teaching her off and on for 2 months, and have seen her overcoming many trials and stumbling blocks set by Satan.   She has overcome an addiction to coffee and has shared some really cool experiences about how she has felt the spirit with us when we teach and has received answers to prayers through us. So Saturday we brought the president of Relief Society over to meet her. They talked and became quick friends.  Everything was set for a successful baptism!! We passed by her house Sunday morning to take her to church, and she wasn’t home…Working, again. Apparently her boss called and said if she didn’t go to work she would be fired. So maybe she´ll get baptized next week? It’s so cool the experiences we have had with her but also SUPER frustrating that we can’t baptize her.  She still hasn’t been able to come to church. She is such a strong spirit, committed to reading the Book of Mormon, and doing what’s right.  We´ll have to wait and see what happens with her.

My only pair of black pants is slowly turning a shade of brown/orange, to add to the list of clothes failing already haha. Elder Kozlowski said the same thing happened with another American, I don’t know if it’s because of the type of material, sun, or what, but they´re getting discolored. So that’s pretty sad :( all my other pants are fine so far though. 

I also sent a picture of the cockroach graveyard we´ve got going on. We´ve killed 16 cockroaches just in the past 5 days.  We decided to start collecting the bodies and made a little cemetery on our patio... 

They are EVERYWHERE, all the time. We have a designated cock roach killing flip flop and have had some pretty funny chases through the house trying to kill them. They´re fast and when they fly, you better watch out! I´ve had a few accompany me during my showers... not a pleasant experience.

We have been proselyting in an area called Torre Babel - the ghetto of the ghetto here in our area. Everyone in Brazil is poor, but this is a whole new level, and they have a lot of problems with drugs, gangs, etc in this area. We have to be careful proselyting and leave before it gets very late. But I have been really grateful for the opportunity because we are teaching some people there who are truly HUMBLE. I was reading in Alma 32 about when he taught the Zoramites, and the poorer class was prepared to receive the gospel because they were humbled. We are teaching one family specifically, Ana and Joao, they are so humble and really appreciative of our messages, but they aren’t married and Joao doesn’t want to get married so I don’t think they will be baptized. But they are such sweet people and it’s been cool to see their love for the spiritual things we teach, even when they don’t understand some reasoning. 

The New Year was pretty uneventful. We went to a members house for dinner and they had a bunch of really good food: a cake with strawberries, fried pastels (kinda like scones), pies, (sweet and savory)… it was great!

On Christmas we had those baptisms of the 2 men, Gil and Jef, I sent a picture of them. They are two very intelligent Brazilians, studying in college here but have plans to move to the U.S.  They’re learning English.  Originally we found them by means of our English Class that Elder K teaches. 

They have really gotten to like us and they received the priesthood this Sunday. I am really hopeful that they will stay firm in the church. But, they really, really, REALLY like us. Its kinda weird. They have begun calling Elder Kozlowski by the titles ´´Rabbi´´ and ´´Master´´ and stand when he enters the room, and they have also expressed their appreciation of my looks / body. Yesterday in church they discussed how I could be a very successful model... If we hadn’t gotten to know them so well already I would be really weirded out, but it’s all good. They´re straight! It’s been cool to see their progress.

Here are some pictures of the area:

Our Building

Our Apartment Enterance

 Some of these are  the walk from the church to our house and some streets that we were proselyting in.  I will do my best to keep pictures coming but it’s tough because I can’t walk around with my camera.

Thought for the New Year:

With the New Year, we´re always setting goals (which I still need to do). It’s good to set spiritual goals that will help us achieve our ultimate goal - Eternal Life.

Alma 37:6 talks about how through small and simple things, great things come to pass. For people that are struggling to keep that eternal perspective and remember purpose here on earth, I encourage you to set some ´´small and simple´´ spiritual goals, which will help you to reach our final goal move toward obtaining eternal life. You will see a difference. Maybe it’s just reading the scriptures again, praying regularly, etc. But the small things truly are important! (I´m kind of a hypocrite because I am terrible at setting goals and still haven’t for the New Year, but that’s my thought for yáll.)

It was super sad to hear about President Monson, and has been a little strange to talk about having a living prophet in our church when right now we don’t have one officially ordained. But, I know that the men of the 12 are called of God and hold all of the keys necessary to move the kingdom of God on the Earth forward.  I also know that the next prophet (talvez [according to Google translate this means “perhaps”] Elder Nelson?) will be worthy and prepared to receive revelation for the church because he will be called of God.

Love you mom, have a good week.

Elder Sork